Today is my 1-year wedding anniversary, so I'm taking a moment to reflect on 1 year of marriage.
People say that marriage is work. I disagree.
Or at least I disagree with that word choice. I think that a marriage takes effort, but effort is different from work in my opinion. Mainly because the kind of effort a marriage takes is the fun kind and, simply put, doesn't feel like work at all.
Trying to find new ways to show someone how much you love them. Opening a bank account together. Figuring out how to purchase gifts without the other person seeing the charges on the joint credit card or on the shared Amazon Prime account. Talking about the future and making important life decisions together. Figuring out what to wear so that you're not dressed too similarly but also wouldn't clash if a picture were taken. Not taking the other person for granted now that you've promised to be a team. Upholding your vows.
I love putting effort into my marriage. Not because I vowed never to let Marc drink wine alone, or because that is the single most frequently invoked promise that I made. I love it because I've always thought being with Marc made me a better person, and now being married to him inspires me to be even better as a husband than I was as a boyfriend or fiancé.
I get to be a part of a very special team, but in my opinion the condition of my membership is my effort at being the best husband I can be. And I can't just coast on what made him fall in love with me. I have to try to make him keep falling in love with me every day for the rest of our lives.
That’s the fun part. It takes effort, for sure. But it certainly doesn’t feel like work.
-JS